Sunday, November 6, 2011

What are Kim Kardashian and Poison Ivy Doing in a Blog About Westerns?

I have been very confused this week by the unfortunate interface of two things that I feel very strongly about, namely Kim Kardashian and Poison Ivy.  You will wonder what this has to do with westerns, and I admit it is only tangentially related.  Do you remember in Lonesome Dove when Gus McCrae said that he should have sided with the Indians and the outlaws?  It is this state of affairs what he was talking about.

Kim Kardashian and the entire Kardashian phenomena symbolizes to me everything that is going wrong with America.  Fame for the sake of fame, wealth for the sake of wealth, contributing nothing meaningful to the world besides making “reality” television.  She is famous for being Bruce Jenner’s step daughter, and making a sex tape (which I gather involved being urinated on) with a B-list rapper.  Somehow she turned this into a multimillion dollar media empire.  Perhaps I should admire the pluck of a young woman who can turn a situation around like that, but I don’t.  She also recently made a quick $17 million by quickly courting, marrying, and divorcing an NBA player in what now appears to be a mostly staged marriage played out on television.  That divorce got more press than the surprise storm that knocked out power to three million people in the Northeast United States.  Oh, and apparently in 2010 PETA named her one of the five worst people or organizations in the world in regards to animal welfare.  The hits just keep on coming.

Now, on to Poison Ivy.  No, not the plant that makes you itch, I have plenty of that growing out of my neighbor’s yard through my fence to fend off the next Pequot invasion (see this post for details).  I mean Poison Ivy, the Batman villain.  My love for Poison Ivy runs deep; that is to say I love this woman as much as a man can love a fictional comic book villain.  It is not just the look, although graphically Poison Ivy moves back and forth from a sultry redhead in tight green outfits to a green skinned siren clad only in vines and leaves, either of which is fine by me.   Poison Ivy is also takes green to a whole new crazy level, which I can respect.  This blog has a long bio on Ivy, but in summary…

So Ivy is basically a hot, redheaded, environmentalist anti-establishment eco-terrorist who has a strong disdain for demure fashion.  The part of me that loves the wilderness and rants about green politics (ie, the part of me that writes this blog about westerns) would seriously consider moving to the DC Universe and joining her gang.  Of course her gang in the DCU is made up entirely of other female super villains in tight latex and spandex with strong undercurrents of lesbianism, so I am not sure exactly where I’d fit in.  I do think I’d make a good Swamp Thing, at least.  Or perhaps I’d just invite her along for a hike with me and the wife.  And is she really so much a villain?  See below and decide for yourself.

With all that said, why am I so bothered?  Just days before filing for divorce to end her sham marriage, Kim Kardashian attended a Halloween costume party dressed as Poison Ivy. Not a particularly good costume, and clearly a costume based on the horrible Batman & Robin movie.  Still, part of me wants to think that this is cool.  Part of me finds the notion of the Kardashian empire repulsive.  It is all very confusing.

Oh, and since you insist, here’s a picture of some cowboys.

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